Chapter 28

Fu Li stood dazedly on the street corner.

He lowered his head, his mind filled with nothing but bewilderment.

The afternoon sunlight streamed through the tall buildings and shone upon him, yet Fu Li couldn't feel the slightest trace of warmth.

The bustling, noisy district unique to a modern metropolis couldn't move Fu Li right now either.

He sat blankly on a park bench. The asphalt road stretched beneath his feet.

The distant traffic lights switched in their regular pattern. The roar of cars made Fu Li feel dizzy and disoriented.

He had truly come back.

Why had he come back.

Why at this moment.

When he had still been struggling bitterly in this world, he had longed for this every waking moment.

But he already had new attachments. Helplessness. Incredibly powerful helplessness.

Just as he didn't know why he had transmigrated, Fu Li also didn't know why he had come back.

Fu Li tiredly looked around him. He recognized this street.

This was the commercial street near the apartment he had rented before transmigrating.

The familiar milk tea shop was still in its old spot. The convenience store next door still had bottled water on promotion outside the entrance. Even the somewhat listless parasol tree at the street corner was exactly the same as in his memories.

Only Apollo was missing.

There was no golden-haired god who always brought his own light, who would hold him and complain the Underworld was too dark, who would get jealous because others got close to him.

"No..."

Fu Li murmured lowly.

His fingers unconsciously tightened. His nails sank into his palm, bringing a faint, stabbing pain.

This wasn't what he wanted.

What he wanted was to be together with Apollo.

Whether it was watching the sunset from the little house in Athens, or tending to the olive trees in the garden at Delphi...

What he wanted was to be together.

Not to stand alone like this amidst the bustling traffic, as if all the experiences before had been nothing but an overly vivid dream.

"Sir, are you alright?"

A middle-aged woman carrying shopping bags stopped in her steps and looked at him with concern.

Only then did Fu Li realize he had been standing here for too long. His complexion was probably terrible as well.

He forced out a smile with difficulty:

"I'm fine. Thank you."

The woman nodded and walked away. After a few steps, she even turned back to glance at him.

This head of eye-catching golden-red long hair was far too conspicuous here.

It was exactly that glance from the woman that made Fu Li subconsciously touch his own hair.

The golden-red hair hung softly before his chest.

A flash of inspiration streaked through his mind.

He tried pulling at it.

Fu Li withdrew his hand with a wince of pain.

The originally fake hair was still real hair.

Fu Li looked down at his own clothes.

A white, Greek-style long robe.

If he had truly returned to the modern world, then what was this all about?

Was this an indication that everything he was now experiencing was false?

Hades and the others had said they would encounter a trial before seeing the Pillar of Heaven.

Could this be that trial?

Everything that had happened in the past was not a dream.

He took a deep breath and forced himself to calm down.

First, he needed to figure out what exactly was going on.

He recalled the words everyone had said to them.

Stripping away the unimportant information, only a few keywords remained.

Choice.

Fu Li suddenly thought of this word.

"Remember your choice."

He had originally thought Hades meant for them not to have regrets.

What if these words were actually a reminder?

Remember the choice. Remember what choice?

Fu Li raised his head. He would explore first.

He stepped forward and walked toward the apartment building in his memories.

The key was still there.

It was inserted in the lock of his door.

The furnishings in the room were almost exactly the same as when he had left.

A small single room. One bed, one desk, one simple wardrobe.

On the desk were still spread several specialized books on agricultural technology.

Everything was frozen at that night before he had transmigrated.

Fu Li walked to the desk. His fingers brushed across the books' covers.

He remembered that night. He'd been preparing for a seminar, staying up late to look up materials. Then he knew nothing.

When he woke again, he was already lying in the wilderness outside Yage Village.

Fu Li smiled bitterly. He had thought he'd long since forgotten.

So it was only hidden in the depths of his memory.

His phone was charging at the bedside. It had long since run out of battery and shut down.

Fu Li plugged it in to charge. In those few minutes waiting for it to turn on, he looked around this place once called "home."

Too small.

Too quiet.

The wall plaster was peeling a little. The sky outside the window was sliced into a narrow strip by the tall buildings.

No sunlight-like warmth wrapped around him. No Apollo grumbling ceaselessly in his ear.

There was nothing here.

Only him, alone.

The phone screen lit up. Missed call and unread message notifications continuously popped up.

Most were from classmates and teachers at school.

They asked why Fu Li had suddenly gone dark.

Mixed in were a few texts from his landlord urging him to pay rent.

The most recent message was from his academic advisor:

"Xiao Fu, where on earth did you go? If you don't come back to class, the school will have to advise you to withdraw. Call back as soon as you see this."

Fu Li stared at that message for a very long time. Then he pressed the power-off button.

He walked to the window and pushed it open.

The early summer wind, carrying the city's distinctive scent, surged in. From downstairs came the laughter and giggles of children.

This world was so real.

"Where are you..."

Fu Li asked in a low voice, knowing he wouldn't get an answer.

Over the next few days, Fu Li tried to find a crack in this seemingly normal life.

He went to the school to apologize to his advisor and made up an excuse.

Though the advisor was displeased, seeing the dark shadows under Fu Li's eyes, he didn't say much more. He only told him to adjust quickly and attend classes properly next week.

He paid the overdue rent, cleaned the dust-laden apartment, and went to the supermarket to buy new instant noodles and fast food.

He walked along the familiar streets and greeted acquaintances.

At night, he lay on the creaky single bed, staring at the ceiling.

Too correct.

This made Fu Li's suspicions even heavier.

A breakthrough came very quickly. Fu Li received a notice from his advisor. The moment he entered the office, a young woman called out to him.

The woman asked with a smile, "Are you Fu Li?"

Fu Li didn't know who she was, so he only nodded.

She smiled. "Fu Li, classmate. This is a formal notice. Next week, there is a lecture on a topic about Ancient Greece. Your attendance is absolutely required."

Fu Li's heart skipped a beat.

"...What time? Who is the speaker?!"

The woman curved her lips. "Next Wednesday, in the school auditorium. The speaker is me."

Fu Li was somewhat disappointed. He had thought he would hear Apollo's name.

The woman seemed to have come just to notify Fu Li. After satisfactorily viewing his reaction, she turned and left.

It was only after she left that Fu Li realized he seemed not to have asked who she was.

And he had completely failed to register her appearance.

Fu Li furrowed his brows. His memory wasn't this poor. How could he completely fail to remember someone he'd just met?

Something was clearly wrong.

He gazed in the direction the woman had vanished, unable to decide.

Was she deliberately luring him to investigate further?

The day of the lecture, Fu Li arrived at the auditorium early.

Quite a few people had come to listen, mostly students and literature and history enthusiasts.

He found a seat near the back and opened the promotional booklet provided by the organizers.

The speaker was that woman who had notified him before.

Fu Li still couldn't remember the woman's face, but he could feel her gaze lingering on him the entire time.

The woman curved her lips. She called out a name.

Just a single name, and Fu Li couldn't control himself from looking at her.

"This is a photograph of a marble statue of Apollo."

The woman spoke eloquently, explaining the legends related to Apollo.

Fu Li's gaze was tightly fixed on that photograph.

Not alike.

The sculpture was beautiful, but it wasn't like his Apollo.

It didn't have those golden eyes that would ripple with tenderness because of him. It didn't have that proud yet awkward little expression. It didn't have the strength and warmth of those arms when holding him.

This was nothing but a piece of cold stone.

"This student, do you have a question?"

Fu Li came back to his senses and found the woman was looking at him with a smile.

The eyes of the entire audience focused on him.

Fu Li stood and accepted the microphone passed over by a staff member.

"I'd like to ask, among all the mythological records, is there any story of Apollo caring especially for a particular mortal?"

He didn't know why he wanted to ask this either.

Perhaps it was that the feeling this woman gave him was too mysterious.

Fu Li felt he would get an answer from her lips.

The woman looked at the photograph of Apollo's sculpture.

"Perhaps?"

She gave an unknown as the answer.

"Your answer has yet to be defined."

The woman tapped the lectern. She stared fixedly at Fu Li.

"We, too, are waiting for an answer."

"The Greek gods as we know them exist eternally. Their love and desire are brief and violent, aimed at possession and destruction."

"Whether there is a new answer—we are very curious."

After the lecture ended, the woman vanished without a trace.

No matter how Fu Li searched for her, it was as if she had simply disappeared.

Fu Li was certain this woman definitely knew something.

He slammed his hand heavily against the wall. He'd missed a crucial opportunity!

The anxiety in Fu Li's heart was nearly overflowing.

That night, he had a dream.

He dreamed that Apollo was holding him from behind.

Apollo's chin rested on Fu Li's shoulder.

His breath brushed past his ear. Fu Li wanted to turn around.

But he found he couldn't move, nor could he make a sound.

"Fu Li!" Apollo said in the dream. His tone sounded so urgent. "I can't find you!"

"Where are you, Fu Li?! I can't find you anywhere!"

"I'm in a world without you!"

"Why won't you answer me?!"

"Fu Li, I'm so afraid that you'll disappear. I want to see you!"

Fu Li wanted desperately to hold Apollo back tightly and tell him that he was suffering just as much as him from not being able to find him.

But he couldn't do anything.

Tears slipped from the corners of his eyes.

Fu Li woke.

The tears sank into the pillow.

He got up and looked out the window. Outside was the nightscape of a modern city.

Unchanging.

What was he supposed to do?!

His longing was multiplying exponentially.

He had heard before that if you discover you're in a nightmare, the best way is to jump down from a high place.

The intense sensation of weightlessness would wake a person having a nightmare.

Fu Li bit his lip. He was the one having a nightmare.

His eyes were resolute.

With determined resolve, he pulled open the door. He took one last look at this home that had carried his past and walked step by step toward the rooftop.

He was going to try.

*

When Apollo opened his eyes, he found himself standing in the center of the Temple of Delphi.

Sunlight streamed down through the tall colonnades, casting orderly patches of light on the ground.

The air was thick with the scent of sacrificial incense.

From the distance came the sound of priests chanting hymns.

He paused briefly. What was going on?!

Apollo looked down at himself.

He was wearing the most resplendent divine robes. Golden threads embroidered complex sun motifs. The laurel crown sat properly. In his hand, he held his silver bow.

He looked around. The temple was magnificent and stately. Believers knelt in devout worship. The sunlight was just right. The breeze was gentle and warm.

But Fu Li was not there.

Apollo's brows furrowed tightly.

He strode forward, passing through the main hall, heading toward the rear hall where he usually handled affairs.

The priests saw him and bowed deeply one after another, their eyes reverent.

"Lord Apollo, today there are three groups of emissaries from different city-states seeking divine oracles. There is also a message from the Goddess Athena, and..."

An elderly priest followed behind him, respectfully reporting the day's schedule.

Apollo waved his hand, cutting him off.

"Where is Fu Li?"

The priest froze:

"Fu Li? Lord, you mean...?"

"My Fu Li."

Apollo's voice grew cold. "Golden-red hair. Green eyes. Where is he?"

Confusion appeared on the priest's face:

"Lord, I don't understand... There is no such person in the temple."

"Are you perhaps remembering incorrectly? Or could it be some new attendant? I can go make inquiries..."

"Enough!"

Apollo no longer wanted to hear any more. He actually said Fu Li didn't exist!

This touched upon the greatest pain in Apollo's heart.

"Leave!"

Apollo's wrath-filled command clearly frightened the priests. They left in terror, leaving Apollo standing alone in the garden.

He remembered that moment at the top of Tartarus when the thick fog had surged forth.

He had been holding Fu Li tightly. Fu Li had held him back. Their bodies had been pressed very close, close enough to feel each other's heartbeats.

The fog had swallowed everything. Fu Li's hand had slipped free from his grasp. He had heard Fu Li shout his name, his voice carrying alarm.

He had wanted to pull Fu Li back. But opening his eyes, he was standing here.

Apollo closed his eyes. Divine power spread outward like ripples, centered on him.

He saw the entirety of Delphi.

Nothing.

Nowhere.

There was no Fu Li.

No matter how Apollo searched, he couldn't find a single trace of Fu Li.

As if he had never appeared.

"Impossible."

Apollo opened his eyes. Deep within the golden pupils, flames ignited.

What kind of joke was this?!

He absolutely did not accept this!

Athens... their home!

Thinking of their home in Athens, Apollo barely managed to steady his emotions.

He told himself over and over. It had to be the Pillar of Heaven's doing!

Apollo spun around and shot into the sky as a streak of golden light.

He skimmed past the temple's dome and flew in the direction of Athens.

The Acropolis of Athens was still majestic. The colonnades of the Parthenon gleamed with the luster of marble under the sunlight.

The marketplace was bustling with voices. Citizens discussed plays.

Children chased each other in the streets. Housewives chatted while drawing water at the well.

Apollo concealed his form and landed on that familiar street at the edge of the city-state.

The little house he and Fu Li had lived in together was still there.

This made Apollo breathe a sigh of relief.

But this was not enough to set Apollo's mind at ease.

He pushed open the door. His expression instantly froze.

No farming tools of Fu Li's. No herbs Fu Li had sun-dried. No clay tablets where Fu Li had recorded his planting insights. No coarse pottery bowls they had used when eating together.

On the windowsill, there wasn't that pot of wildflowers Fu Li had liked so much either.

Apollo walked to the bedside.

There was no bedding on the wooden bed.

There should have been the bedding Fu Li had laid out here.

He remembered Fu Li was afraid of the cold and would always shrink into his arms at night.

He also remembered Fu Li was afraid of the heat and would secretly stick his feet out of the covers on summer afternoons. When discovered by him, he would also quietly argue in defense.

Those warm memories, memories that belonged to them, seemed to have never existed in this world.

Apollo's hand pressed against the bed board. His knuckles paled from the force.

He stood up, walked out of the little house, and headed toward the patch of farmland Fu Li had reclaimed.

The farmland was at the foot of Mount Hymettus, not far from the little house.

Apollo remembered the way.

He had walked it many times. Sometimes to accompany Fu Li there. Sometimes to go pick him up and bring him home.

But when he reached that gentle slope, all he saw was a stretch of desolate grassland.

Nothing at all.

Apollo stood there. The wind stirred the tips of his golden hair.

The sunlight was fierce, baking the earth hot, yet he felt a chill spread from the bottom of his heart.

Apollo refused to give up. He used his light to search for Fu Li's figure.

The ever-victorious radiance could not illuminate his Fu Li.

From the initial violent rage to his current state of terror and dread.

It was as if Fu Li had died in his arms all over again.

This time, even the traces of his existence had vanished.

Apollo walked unconsciously into the farmland. He was still waiting, hoping the owner of the farmland would suddenly return and say to him with a smile, "Scared you, didn't I?"

Dazed and muddled, he closed his eyes.

Where to find you, Fu Li...?

I've lost you once again...

"My Lord?"

A hesitant voice came from behind.

Apollo turned wearily and saw a somewhat familiar old man.

It was Moira, whom Fu Li had gotten to know in Athens.

The old man carried a basket and seemed about to head into the city. Seeing Apollo, he was first surprised, then hurriedly bowed in salute in a fluster.

"Lord Apollo, God of Light, what brings you here?"

Apollo looked at him, his throat tight:

"Do you know a person called Fu Li?"

"Fu Li?"

Moira furrowed his brows and tried hard to recall, then shook his head. "Apologies, my Lord. I've never heard of this person. Is he a follower of yours? Do you need me to help make inquiries?"

"...No need."

Apollo turned, preparing to leave. He was utterly disappointed.

The Underworld. He would storm the Underworld once more!

Behind him, Moira suddenly let out an "Ah."

"Wait, my Lord... The one you spoke of—is he a foreigner? With a very unique hair color, golden-red, and green eyes?"

Apollo abruptly stopped in his tracks:

"You remember him?"

"It's not remembering. It's..." Moira's expression was somewhat puzzled. "It's a few days ago. I had a dream. In the dream, a young man came to find me. He said he wanted to buy land and asked how to find the scribe. He looked very refined. The color of his hair and eyes was just as you described. In the dream, I also introduced him to Sila. He bought the wasteland at the mountain's foot."

The old man's voice grew lower and lower, as if he himself found these dream words absurd.

"But after waking, I thought, that must have been a dream. That piece of land at the mountain's foot had been abandoned for many years. No one bought it at all. And I didn't know any foreigner at all... But for some reason, that dream was exceptionally real. So real that I still remember that young man's appearance even now."

Apollo's heart gave a heavy pound.

"What happened to him afterward? In the dream."

"Afterward, it seemed like he was summoned by the King of Athens. They said he was some sort of farming advisor, and he even received a reward. But the dream broke off there. I woke up." Moira shook his head and smiled bitterly. "My Lord, this must simply be an absurd dream. Don't take it to heart..."

"No."

Apollo cut him off. His golden eyes blazed astonishingly bright.

"That was not a dream."

Those were traces.

He had finally found traces of Fu Li!

Apollo noted the dream Moira had spoken of. He rushed to the Underworld and forcibly made the God of Sleep weave a dream for him.

In the dream, he saw Fu Li with his back turned to him.

Apollo urgently pulled him into his arms, continuously pouring out his own breakdown.

The Fu Li in his arms gave no reaction at all.

Just as Apollo was about to see Fu Li, the dream ended.